Moving forward...
I'm very frustrated. This bag that I carry around is a burden and I don't know how else to think of it. It is probably only 1-2 pounds but I carry it around everywhere (I have to), it gets tangled, needs to be dried off, on and off, and I'm always worried about people tripping over it. It's stupid. It's a hassle and it makes me sick... not often but often enough that I get pretty irritated that I can't lead a normal life.
I've decided to call it Wilson... (CastAway, get it?) Everywhere I go it'll go for the next 6 weeks. How lame. Oh well.
I think I have more of the nausea when thinking about certain foods than the tiredness. It is going to be difficult to eat, I believe.
I often like to daydream now. I don't want to focus on the fact that I have cancer. Thinking about it hurts more than going through it. The future is so uncertain at times and to actually process through your mind that this is actually happening is absurd.
School is becoming more and more of a hassle but somehow I'll make it through.
Thanks for the prayers!
7 comments:
Jo, if I could carry the extra luggage for you I would! This may sound stupid to you, but my heart just aches for all you are going through right now, and I can't do a thing about it, but give you love and care for you which I do. There are so many people in your life who would take this away from you in a second, and that's because we love you sooooooo very much.
God loves you!!
Wilson! Very clever. Are you going to decorate the bag up? Maybe attach some funky keychains to the strap or whatever? If you have to live with it, might as well, huh?
I'm sorry you're going through this, but you have an indomitable spirit. And if it starts falling, you have us...and there are a LOT of us...to lift you back up.
Love you, Jo-bana. Praying for you and thinking of you often.
Jo, here are some verses that I want to share with you! When I read them I thought of you, and I'm not trying to be a teacher, just a friend to help you through this.
2Corinthians 1:3-4a
Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, The Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles.
James 1:2b-4
Whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you knowthat the testingof your FAITH develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.
I wasn't sure if the James verse was a good one to put in here, but I did. God's word is so important to read, especially when your hurting like you are right now. I hope these help you through this trial.
Love you!!
Can you transfer the contents of Wilson to another, slimmer bag? I have a hydration back-pack or two that we could probably put Wilson's guts into, and then you'd have this tiny little backpack on instead of a bag that gets in your way.
Jo, I'm praying that chemo/radiation is going ok. How are you doing? I know that may sound like a stupid question,but I've missed hearing from you.
How's school going? How's work? I know life is tough right now and I may not get an answer, but I still needed to ask. There's not a moment that doesn't go by that I don't wonder how your doing, what your doing, or what I should be writing on this blog.
I truly care and love you!!
I hope to hear from you soon!!
Hey Jo!
Every day I think about you and what it must be like to experience the hell that is cancer. You are very brave and strong. Dont give up, keep your head high (even though i know it isnt easy to do), and just know that so many people love you and are praying for you! I might not know you very well as a person, but knowing Ryan very well gives me a strong feeling that only you are the best for him and he is the best for you.
Anything I can do, always here to help! Im praying for you and Ryan every day. Stay strong Jo!
-Travis
Jo, I think about you every day and I know that you are by far the strongest person I know. you are a fighter and you don't give up untill you win. I have seen it with my own eyes. ( Ensminger's class!)
I just want you to know that I'm here for you and I will help you out with anything you need just let me know. I really want to be there for you. 290-9605
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